Should You Give A Practical Gift?
In that moment when you just aren’t sure- should you get a fun gift or something you know they’ll really use? The struggle is real. Practical or romantic? Expensive or charming? Professional or humorous?
We've all been there. Don't despair. Sometimes a practical gift is just the thing.
Practical vs. thoughtful:
You need to consider your audience. If your recipient is a romantic interest, practicality may not be a good idea, even after 15 years of marriage. There are exceptions to this rule, of course, and circumstances and occasions should be taken into consideration.
- Has the recipient given you a gift before? Was it something that was practical/utility or was it something really special and personalized to you? That may help you determine the expectations of your recipient. Somebody who goes out of their way to give unique, special gifts will likely appreciate something with higher emotional value than a practical gift.
- What is your intent? Are you hoping to impress the recipient, surprise them, or just let them know you’re thinking of them? Be sure to ask yourself if the intention is for your own enjoyment as much as it is for the recipient’s. For example, you may feel good giving a gift in their name to a social cause that’s important to you, but they may feel it’s an empty gesture if they don’t have the same commitment to that cause as you do.
- Are there any lifestyle, cultural or ethical considerations? Would giving them something like a bottle of alcohol be inappropriate because they don’t drink?
- How well do you know the recipient? If this person or occasion is important, take a step back and jot down a few notes to yourself. What are their hobbies? What might enrich their lives?
- What might be the most meaningful, regardless of its practicality? Is there something you can do or give them that will last longer than the ten minutes they look at something in a box and say “Oh thank you” and you (hopefully)both experience a little dopamine hit before the gift ends up in a drawer somewhere?
WHEN A PRACTICAL GIFT IS A GOOD IDEA:
Practical gifts may be welcome when your recipient is on a limited income or “just starting out.” For example, students moving out for the first time or newlyweds who don’t already have an established household should for the most part welcome practical gifts.
If your recipient is somebody like a neighbor or family member who you aren’t trying to impress, you know for a fact it’s something they want, and the gift for them is not intended to convey an emotional meaning, a practical gift might be a good idea.
I may be risking a shoe thrown at my head here, but some of those 1950s advertisements showing swooning women getting a vacuum on Christmas Day may not have been as sexist as you might think. In the 2020s, immediate gratification is pretty much a norm. If you want something, you go out and get it and if you can’t afford it, there are 8 offers to finance it for you on credit so you can go home happy. Even 30 years ago, a lot of bigger purchases were planned or considered a splurge. Many households were on a limited budget without the ability to purchase items on credit, so a vacuum cleaner or shiny new toaster may actually have been what she really was hoping for on Christmas morning in 1954.
WHEN A PRACTICAL GIFT IS NOT THE BEST IDEA:
What are the expectations (if any) of the recipient? Is the person you are choosing a gift for one of those thoughtful people who gives the perfect gift, every time? You may want to think about the time and effort they put into the last gift they gave you, and reciprocate.
Is it a special occasion or a public occasion when something practical might be awkward? There have been times I was overjoyed when a practical present from “Santa” found its way to my Christmas stocking that might have been awkward to gift in front of extended family at the Christmas Eve party the night before. Bless that man for his discretion.
Is it something special like a milestone anniversary with your partner? You better pull out some stops and save practical for another occasion.
What about Money?
Giving money may be a welcome way to celebrate occasions like graduations, but in some situations it may be considered tacky or a lazy gift. We’ve all been invited to those weddings where they insisted on only money for their honeymoon and yes, I’ve even received an invitation specifying the expected amount and where to send it so it could be “added to the registry.” I declined to attend because it felt like I was expected to pay an entrance fee to attend that wedding.
A professional environment is a different situation. In the workplace, a monetary gift is usually considered an appropriate choice when giving gifts to a group of employees.
